The Masks We Wear
By Karleigh N’diaye “But you got a good family, so why does it matter?” “I mean… at least somebody wanted you.” I’ve heard some version of these words more times than I can count. And…
Reunions: It’s complicated
by Brad Ewell Adoption reunions, even at their very best, can be horribly complicated. This is what I tell adoptees, first parents, and adoptive parents when the topic of reunion comes up. My goal isn’t…
On the Origin of Species, Adoptive Relationships, & the Question of Culture
By Shannon QuistWhen I was a kid, I wanted to be a veterinarian. Or possibly work in a zoo (I’m still holding onto the zoo dream for retirement purposes). I love animals. As a kid,…
Adoption, Truth, and Independence
by April Dinwoodie Eleven years ago, I sat down around the Fourth of July to write about what freedom and independence meant to me as a transracially adopted person. Looking back at that 2015 piece,…
Raised by Yoda: Fatherhood, Adoption, and Unexpected Wisdom
by Jean Widner My adopted dad was Yoda. All of 5’6”, he was round, mostly bald, and never terribly physical. He had large-ish ears that stuck out broadly on the sides of his head. He…
Mother Love
by Laura L. Engel When I was a teenager in the 1960s, I would bluntly announce to anyone who would listen that I wasn’t going to have children. I was going to move to New…
Mothering Ourselves
by Joanne Bagshaw, PhD, LCPC The last time I spoke with my adoptive mother was on my birthday five years ago. Surprised to see her number on my phone, I cautiously yet hopefully answered. After…
Relinquish(ed)
by Aimee Sones For quite some time I’ve had this idea to make a neon sign that spells relinquish(ed), where the (ed) blinks on and off. As a hypervigilant adoptee, for much of my life,…
Letting Go and Moving Forward
by Kathleen Kirstein I describe being a late-discovery adoptee as having lived my life in the grooves of a vinyl record. My hand guides the needle onto the record as it plays pitch-perfect music. Winning…
The Stories That Were Never Told: Ancestry, Silence, and the Weight Women Carried
by Dr. Adam Anthony (he/him) There is a common story people tell about adoption.And then there is the story that never gets told or perhaps is less heard of.The version that is more nuanced, complex, and messy.…